Are you struggling with dating insecurities related to your height? I’ve learned many tips and lessons about dating as a tall girl that I will share with you.
Dating as a tall girl is a unique experience. Having a characteristic that stands out so much can often be a conversation starter, though for some of us tall girls quickly becomes the conversation stopper.
With the average height of men being 5’9, we often feel ostracized for being taller than a large portion of society. Even if we could care less about our partner’s height difference, we live in a society that celebrates hetero relationships where the man is significantly larger and taller than the woman, which often makes us hyper fixate or anxious about being tall.
I know personally that I have had my fair share of dating difficulties, but I also know that I wouldn’t trade my height for anything, and that is why I feel obliged to share some of the tips and lessons I have learned so far as a twenty-eight-year-old 6’2.5 girl. Hopefully, other tall girls can take these tips and lessons and feel empowered to date confidently as tall girls.
While I have touched upon this topic very briefly, in my tall girl dating tips, I wanted to share some more valuable lessons and tips that I have picked up in my many single years of using the dating apps prior to entering a relationship this past year (which I met on hinge btw for other tall girls wanting to know what apps to use)!
Without further adieu, here are some important tall girl dating tips and lessons I want to pass on to you.
Tall Girl Dating Tips
First and foremost, no matter your height- dating apps are essential in today’s society. While there is a chance you can meet your significant other out in person, dating apps open your dating pool to such a larger selection.
As tall girls, the larger the selection, the better. While we may not have a height preference, we may internalize that shorter men won’t be interested or vice versa out in a public setting, which could impact our ability to flirt and communicate openly.
Secondly, dating apps open you to a dating pool of men who may have (i hate to say this) been too intimidated to approach you in person. I have heard this from SO many other tall women about their significant others – that if they were to have been in a bar, he likely would have been too intimidated to approach.
If you aren’t a shy girl, then, by all means, use your extroverted abilities and approach that guy you want to talk to. But if you are like me and have to have liquid courage even to consider approaching a guy first, dating apps are your best bet.
This may mean that you need to make the first move on the dating app too. While in the ideal world we would have men approach us first, men have, in some ways, internalized the sexism that lots of girls have, that the guy should be taller than the girl. So even if he thinks it’s BS, he may fear that you believe it to be true.
So if you come across a profile that you want to talk to, message them and keep a loose but engaging convo. The hope is that he will see you’re interested and ask you out shortly after.
Tall Girl Dating Lessons
First lesson: I never thought about it this way, but my boyfriend suggested to me that girls tend to underestimate their height and as most of us know, guys overestimate their height. So if you feel bad for not putting your exact height, don’t feel bad, not that you shouldn’t be shouting it from the rooftops, but if you think that saying 5’11 instead of 6 feet will widen your pool, then so be it. Men do this ALLLL the time.
Again, do not feel any insecurity about your actual height- some guys love and prefer a woman over six feet tall.
Biggest lesson: I said this before and will say it again, your height is as big of a deal as you want to make it. Of course, the guy could make it a big deal and comment, but shrugging it off will signal to him that it really isn’t a consideration to you. But if you comment and feel insecure about it, it will be noticeable to the person you’re talking to.
Final Lesson: If a guy is not interested and you think it is because of height, do not take it personally. First off, why would you want to date someone who doesn’t appreciate all your unique characteristics? But secondly, just know that some guys have preferences just like we do about certain characteristics.
It may seem vain, but we all have those characteristics we gravitate towards that just seem innate. Just know that there are guys who have that same innate desire for tall girls just like some do for short girls, and I don’t mean in the creepy fetish way lol.
I have heard from guys who said they really only have dated tall girls before and are more attracted to taller women. It wasn’t because they were 6 foot 8 and anything below 6 feet would be too short, but these were men who were all around six feet and preferred someone their own height or an inch or two taller.
It’s weird for me to say that this is a lesson learned because I know that I have always gravitated toward men that are exactly my height on the opposite side. I have never really preferred taller than 6’3. But, of course, that isn’t my main concern, it just so happened to be that way, and I could care less if a guy is an inch or two shorter- so why wouldn’t I have thought that the same could be true for men?
Just remember that we all have our own unique characteristics and preferences. So while the media may glorify that image of the man towering over a petite woman, that is far from reality and does not encapsulate all of mens’ and womens’ desires or preferences by any means.